38. Changes 改变 1980

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When Barbara came back from her Hong Kong holiday she hadn't changed her hairstyle. The hairdressers in Hong Honk had advised her to keep her hair as it was and not to curl it. She had nice healthy hair; it would be a shame to give it treatments which would damage it. I was relieved that Barbara followed this advice, I liked Barbara's hair as it was.

The university let me know that if I missed any more lectures and compulsory practicals they were going to expel me. This meant that I couldn't see Barbara any more during the week. It was quite a shock to us as we also had lost our meeting place in Cambridge. A little while ago Steve and Di split up and both of them had moved to another place. Suddenly we only could see each other only on Friday evening and Saturday morning, while we were used in seeing each other nearly every day.

We reacted completely different to this new situation. I suddenly found myself with an enormous amount of spare time. Within a few weeks I found a new allocation for all this time. I discovered that there was a student social life in Norwich which I hadn't experienced yet and it suited me very well. Being on a campus of a university with about 3000 people between the age of 18 and 22, with great sport facilities, gave me an enormous energy. I went to popconcerts, I tried to stay awake during the all night cinema marathons and watched the plays performed by the student acting society. Soon I had build up a social life existing within the new art-cultures, making music and participating in competitive sports. I only came to my room to sleep.

I got selected for the university volleyball and athletic team and also for the county volleyball team. At the last re-union of the University a few years ago I saw that my picture was still hanging in their hall of fame. Being selected for the university sport teams meant that we had matches against other universities nearly every weekend. The university arranged and paid for the journeys and the hotels we stayed in. Being with a team, meeting other university teams, who did their best to be good hosts (plenty of food and drinks) made these weekends' great experiences and fantastic fun. Mostly I leave on Saturday afternoon and came back exhausted early Monday morning. The climax must have been the British student athletics championships in Edinburg for which I had qualified.

Barbara reacted completely different. Her life didn't change. She went to college, worked by Burger King and sat alone in her room. Barbara didn't want to change her life or expand her social life. As the weeks passed she became more and more lonely. One time she told me that one evening she didn't want to sit in her room and went to the discotheques on Leicester square where we always went. She just to sat there and listened to the music. Every week that passed Barbara became more and more unhappy, she didn't say much anymore, she was tired and complained about headaches. Her sparkle and laugh had gone and her sadness in-creased. After a few weeks Barbara didn't want to come to Norwich anymore.

At this time we were the two opposites in how we filled in our life. I was full of energy, wanting to do things, feeling good, Barbara was the complete opposite. We didn't argue or have heated discussions but we didn't laugh anymore either. We both knew that this way our relation was not going to last long. We had do something before it would be too late. Therefore we decided that I was going come to London the week before the Easter holiday to stay with Barbara. Then we would have a week together to work on a solution to improve our relation.

改变

Barbara从香港休假回来没有按计划改变发型。香港的发型师劝她保留原来的发型。她的头发很美丽发质也很好，烫发会损坏发质。见Barbara听从了发型师的建议我松了口气，我很喜欢她原来的发型。

我的大学通知我如果再有任何旷课行为，将会被除名。这意味着我在工作日不再能去看Barbara了。而更糟糕的是我们在剑桥的会面地点也没了。Steve和Di不久前分手了，两个人都搬离了原来的家。突如其来地，我们每周只能在周五晚上和周六上午见面，而我们早已习惯几乎每天都见面的生活。

面对这种改变，我们两个有着截然不同的反应。我突然发现自己有了用不完的空余时间。几周之内我就找到了新的时间安排方法。我发现在Norwich有着我还没有发现的学生社交生活，而且也适合我的兴趣。这个住着约3000个年龄在18到20岁年轻人的校园里，到处都是各种体育设施，这给了我用之不竭的精力。我去听演唱会，看通宵电影，看学生出演的戏剧。很快我就建立起了自己的社交生活，参与艺术文化活动，做音乐，参加体育比赛。我忙到只回寝室去睡觉。

我被选入大学排球队和田径队，进而进入镇排球队。几年前的大学同学聚会，我看到我的照片仍挂在名誉厅的墙上。进入校队意味着我们几乎每周末都会和其他学校比赛。学校会安排并负责食宿。 和不同学校校队交流，其他学校的热情招待（很好的食物和饮料）令这些周末成为愉快的经历。通常我周六离开周一上午精疲力尽地回校。最忙的时候是在爱丁堡举办的全英学生运动会，我那时入围参加了比赛。

Barbara的情况完全不同。她的生活没有改变。她去上学，去汉堡王打工，独自呆在房间里。她不想改变她的生活或是去打开她的社交圈子。几个星期过去了，她变得越来越孤独。她告诉我一个晚上她不想待在家里，她就去了那个我们常去的莱斯特广场(Leicester square)附近的Disco. 她只是坐在里面听音乐。几个星期过去了，她变得越来越不开心，话也不多说。 她很累，并抱怨头痛。她的光芒和她的笑声一起消失了，她的悲伤却增加了。又过了几个星期，她不再想到Norwich来了。我们都知道这样下去我们的关系是无法维持多久的。我们必须在事情变得不可挽回之前做些努力。因此我们决定在复活节前一周我到伦敦和Barbara一起。这样我们有一周的时间一起找一找解决问题的方法。

(Thanks to Natalie for the translation)